Kevin turns hero and solves national traffic crisis ... !

Okay so this is a story about travel that, because of my involvement, became personal

    We had gone on a tour of Lisbon, Portugal, that included a visit to a local nearby village with amazing views ... and as it turns out, a lot of traffic - like over-the-top insane traffic. 

    We were with a tour guide and a small van of eight passengers.  It was a fun time of visiting fascinating historical sites and walking around the hillside village and gardens of Sintra, Portugal. 

    So we had already completed a long day of sight seeing when we set out for the remaining part of the excursion - to the sea shore.

    Only, we got stuck in traffic.  This was no ordinary traffic problem.  The roads in Portugal are incredibly winding and narrow and will only accommodate very small cars in a limited range. 
    And of course, this is Easter weekend - and it's a very nice day, and everyone in the entire country is on this road, and you can probably throw in the population of Spain and Morocco. 

    We set out in our van and don't get very far before we are hopelessly entwined in a mess.  No one could go forward or backward.  People began to get out of their cars and light up cigarettes and work on their tan, and make phone calls on their cell phones.  A rather casual response I must say. 

    "Looks like we're gonna be here a long time" our driver/guide says and turns off the car, "this doesn't look good"  Which, by European standards (they are very patient), sounds like an emergency call to the Virgin Mary.  To me, this looks bad.  We have already been there for over 30 minutes. 

    We sit there for a while longer and nothing happens.  Nobody does anything except wave their arms around shout, and then light up another cigarette.  I begin to think I will die of old age before we ever get out of this mess. 

    Cars are in total gridlock on a ridiculously narrow uphill road that would barely handle a horse cart.  And yet there are busses and taxis and vans and frustrated tourists and ... did I mention that there is no alternative, this is the only road?

    So finally, almost out of boredom or curiousity as much as anything else, I get out of the van.   I begin to walk up the road, trying to figure out what is causing this log jam.  I have to squeeze between cars to a point where I rearrange my internal organs, but I press on, up the hill.

    What the heck is causing this problem?  So, finally, traffic begins to inch forward, and I can see (because of my diagnostic abilities) that the problem is simply that there is not enough room on the road for the number of vehicles involved.  Brilliant deduction!

    Hey (I think), if everyone just waits and takes their turn, it might work out. But that is not the case.  As always, some people don't play nice, and some drivers are very aggressive and try to force their way through impossibly tough spots.  

    So I figure, what have I got to lose?  I stand in their way, blocking their path, and allowing other vehicles to inch by.  The drivers I am blocking immediately honk their horns and get pissed off.  I act surprised and say "oh, terribly sorry old chap, am I in your way?"
    Eventually, traffic  begins to move a little better.

    In the meantime, Fiona is in the van with our guide and the rest of the passengers, and it seems like hours.  They are wondering "where is Kevin?  He's been gone a long time ..."  and Fiona says "oh, he'll figure this out, and we'll eventually find him, and if we don't - well, he can make his way back to the hostel." 

    So after some time passes and progress is made, I am holding back a large delivery van (which probably shouldn't be here in the first place) and pleading with the driver to wait for the next rig to pass.

    He doesn't speak English and looks at me puzzled.  I keep talking, and he eventually turns to his wife next to him and and says "what the hell is this guy talking about?"  And his wife says "he is asking you to wait."

    So the guy waits, surprisingly, against his will.  Maybe he is figuring he will have another cigarette and an espresso, and maybe trim his toe nails.  I don't know, but he waits. 
    And low and behold, here comes our van up the road!  It's been a long time and the passengers and the driver see me holding back traffic and they are elated. We will get through this!

    So once our van gets arrives, they can see me, they are amazed, and I get all the credit for clearing up the traffic jam.  I climb in, and everybody begins to clap and cheer!  I am a hero!  HA HA HA!

    Actually, I was slightly embarrassed ... aw shucks ... but we were able to carry on.  We accomplished our travel goals.  We made it to the coast and back to the city of Lisbon, only about three hours late!

Now some pictures of the Lisbon area!

Our "Hostel" (we don't use the words "youth hostel") was in the central train station, a rather spectacular setting.  We were in the upper left hand windows ...

We had some dinner at an outdoor sidewalk cafe, which are everywhere in Lisbon

This is a scene from the beautiful garden on the hill in Sintra, Portugal

Of course, there's a castle at the top of the hill, in very vivid colors!   By the way, the picture at the top of this blog post - the royal guy in stain glass - was taken in the chapel inside this castle.  He was king Manuel the First, who acheived many significant things, like colonizing Brazil, and Mozambique, and sponsoring Vasco de Gama to sail around the world and find a route to India.  

The view at the top was amazing, you can see the Atlantic Ocean in the distance, what a great day!

Beware of tourist information sources!  They recommended we take this tram ride as one of the best things to do in Lisbon.  Slow, crowded, and couldn't see anything, pretty lame if you ask me. 

It was Easter while we were there, and we went to church.  Not just any ordinary church but a grand cathedral, complete with music, and singing, and other stuff we didn't understand because it was all in Portuguese ....

Once we finally made it to the coast in the story above, the sunset was impressive.  This is a place called the Cap du Roca, and is the westernmost point on continental Europe.